Discovering Me

Me on having babies, losing babies, trying to have babies and hoping to bring this one home.

Wednesday, February 22, 2006

What now?

I don't know what's next. I do know I'm done with the RE for a while. I may drag out the old fertility monitor and try that for a few months. I may even renew the old Fertility Friend subscription and try that.

Wanna hear something funny? When we first started "trying" and I started at FF, I only got the 3 month subscription because I was stupid enough to think I wouldn't be there that long. Joke's on me, eh? Maybe this time, I'll do the lifetime. Makes sense since it's taking a lifetime to get pregnant.

I'm honestly not as upset as I thought I would be. I'm still a little surprised. I really thought this was it. It's not. It never is. I don't understand why. That is still the hardest part...

8 Comments:

  • At 3:09 PM , Anonymous rach said...

    I don't understand, either.

     
  • At 7:05 PM , Blogger lauralu said...

    there's no rhyme or reason to this, but i hope you defy reason (and rhyme, or whatever) and get your heart's desire.

     
  • At 5:58 AM , Anonymous anissa said...

    I so wish that I could just take all of this pain away for you. I wish I had the power to give you what you want most. I really hate seeing this happend to you.

    Life does really seem to kick you when your down and I don't understand it .

    I am here if you need me.

     
  • At 5:49 PM , Blogger vixanne wigg said...

    I'm so sorry honey. It's so not fair. I was really hoping to hear good news from you.

     
  • At 6:48 PM , Blogger formerteacher said...

    I did the same thing with FF; I never thought I'd ever have a problem getting pregnant!

    I'm so sorry this is all happening to you. It just doesn't make any sense.

     
  • At 10:27 AM , Anonymous Emily G said...

    Michelle, I am so sorry the transfer didn't work.
    Check the Mommies of the World website, I am going to leave you a private message.

     
  • At 1:08 PM , Blogger kati said...

    Michelle, I am right there with you. My beta was also negative. I don't know where to go from here either. I once thought that it was such an ordinary dream to have kids. Not anymore.

     
  • At 4:43 PM , Anonymous rach said...

    Hi M,
    I'm hoping you're doing ok tonight. I have been thinking about you alot; this month is our first official month trying, and I can't imagine what you are going through. Audrey dying, and then all of this. I just can't imagine. Just know that I am here for you, and I am praying that the ache in your arms and heart is filled with a precious life very very soon.

    Be good to yourself and all those who love you (a LOT of people!).

    Rachel

     

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