Discovering Me

Me on having babies, losing babies, trying to have babies and hoping to bring this one home.

Wednesday, April 05, 2006


So I saw that on a license plate today and all I could think was...Yeah, I'm waiting...what the fuck am I waiting for?

Now, I may just piss some people off (I'm sorry for that, I really am), but I'm angry again. I want my baby back. I want her back so I don't have to do this anymore. I want to move on with my life, but I can't do it without her. I see her in every blond-haired, cherub-cheeked baby I see and think how bad this sucks. Every. Fucking. Day. It. Sucks.

Baby girl, mommy misses you so very much.


  • At 1:09 PM , Blogger Kathy McC said...

    It does suck. I am sorry. ((((hugs))))

  • At 3:15 PM , Blogger formerteacher said...

    You SHOULD be holding your daughter right now. I think it's totally normal that you are feeling this way; who wouldn't be?!

    Losing your daughter was beyond awful. No one can comprehend it, I'm sure, unless they've been there. I'm so sorry that you lost beautiful Audrey. I really am.

  • At 4:29 PM , Blogger R said...

    I'm sorry. License plates and bumper stickers like that piss me off.

  • At 4:32 PM , Blogger Lorem ipsum said...

    God has a finite amount of time to spend, but we don't. I don't understand it, either. Seems pretty selfish of God, doesn't it?

  • At 6:41 PM , Blogger K said...

    Wating for god to what? Ugh. I dont' like bumper stickers like that. I'd like one that says "God owes me a shit load of money for the IVF i had to pay for"

    You deserve to have your daughter. ::hug::

  • At 5:04 AM , Blogger kate said...

    (((((hugs)))))) I am sorry. It DOES suck and it is just so wrong.

    Yeah, those kinds of license plates/bumper stickers irritate me. Sanctimonious, they are.

  • At 7:24 AM , Blogger msfitzita said...

    I'm so sorry Michelle. It does suck, in the worst way possible, and I'm so, so sorry.


  • At 2:32 PM , Blogger Jill said...

    I'm so very sorry (((hugs)))


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