Discovering Me

Me on having babies, losing babies, trying to have babies and hoping to bring this one home.

Tuesday, March 15, 2005

What to Title This One...?

I haven't posted much because I just can't seem to get my thoughts together enough to make a coherent entry. My mind has been all over the board the last few days.

My boss is trying to screw me out of my bonus for last year. That's been a fun fight. I will probably lose, but in the end it will just make me feel less guilty about quitting and maybe even make me less willing to help him through transitioning someone new into my spot. It might just piss dh off enough that he'll be more supportive too. We'll see.

I've been wrestling with the whole TTC thing. The drama of last month is more than I can deal with again. My "type A" personality will not let me be easygoing about it. It's just not in me. I've got a week or so left before the saga starts again, so I'm trying to stay calm and just let it happen. Maybe the best I can do it be prepared for it.

Gracie has been a handful this week. She's learned what standing in the corner is all about. Some of it might be that we just haven't had a minute away from each other or a minute's peace. We're both used to a little "me" time and neither of us have gotten that with Jim being gone and having company last weekend. She makes up for it with the moments that just melt my heart. Thankfully there are plenty of those. I try to be grateful just to have her, but we still manage to push each other's buttons from time to time.

My third anniversary is tomorrow. It kind of sucks to have it in the middle of the week. I don't really feel like leaving Gracie with someone so we can be "alone", so this year will no doubt prove to be pretty uneventful. I do love my husband, but this year just feels kind of blah. Does everyone have years like that? I sure the hell hope so.


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