Discovering Me

Me on having babies, losing babies, trying to have babies and hoping to bring this one home.

Wednesday, May 23, 2007

Here I am!

This is going to be quick and disjointed. Our ISP is still fouled up. I had to cancel the whole DSL busniness and go back to cable...which is a hassle in itself. Probably be next week before I'm back for real.


Rifle is fine. Was back to himself the next day. I'm chalking it up to total confusion. Atlas (pom) is now not so okay. He's old and I guess being at the kennel was more than his belly could take. His gut got all out of whack and he ended up pretty sick. We've had to cancel our NC trip because I'm scared to leave him again so soon. Some may say I'm nuts for cancelling over a dog, but screw them.


Level II was yesterday. All the parts seem to be right and growing well. It was hard to get a good look at CC's heart, so we'll see that on the fetal echo in a few weeks. Disappointing part was that we didn't get a money shot. Legs were tightly clamped. the U/S tech was not one of those who would go out of her way to try very hard though. We'll have other chances, but I wanted to know yesterday...


I have no idea what's going on with you all. I'm so sorry. I'm going to try and catch up. I think of you all often and hope all is well.


Stupid Vegas house is still for sale. Really puts a cramp on my shopping.


Why does Target only have a lot of cute maternity clothes when I don't need them?


I've grown out of my bras. I went from a nice 34B to a 36C with Gracie and to a 36D with Audrey. I believe I have graduated to a double something.


The maternity swimsuits this year suck.


I'm really not as disappointed about missing vacation as I thought I'd be. Why is that?


I'm hungry and sitting here in Panera Bread is not helping. I'll try and check in again soon.

Thursday, May 17, 2007

Dog Help

I need the help of all you dog people reading.

After 4 days at the kennel while we were in Atlanta, Rifle has completely regressed in his house-training. I cleaned up pee all day yesterday. Not only that, but he's a complete nut. He's tearing things up that he never cared about before (like his bed outside).

Is he just mad at us or excited to be home? Are we really starting at square one? What do I do? We have a trip to NC planned in a few weeks, are we going to do this all over again?

Let me just say, I did expect *some* confusion. He's still a puppy afterall. But this? Not this dog I don't even really recognize.


Wednesday, May 16, 2007


19 weeks. Halfway for me. HB this morning was 150-5ish. I'm going with girl since the men on both sides have notoriously low resting heart rates. I guess we'll find out for sure at the level II next week.

My ISP is still giving me fits. We still have spotty service; some days we wake up and it's there, some days not so much. It's really putting a damper on keeping up with all of you.

Atlanta was nice. My BIL's rental car got broken into while we were there. All the idiot got was 2 blue-tooth headsets and my car charger. Asshole. Well, that and when he broke the window, he did it on the side with Gracie's car seat. Also not a big deal except that he cut himself reaching in and bled all over her seat. So-damn-nasty. Some dirty man's DNA all over my baby's seat. Makes me gag. We bought a new one before the police report was even done.

Even with the car drama, the trip was nice. I really do love that part of Jim's family. They have two great kids and are really neat people to hang out with. They are all so wonderful to Gracie. We're lucky that for the most part, Jim's brothers are great since is Mother is such a whack-job.

By the way, we'll be spending Christmas with the Whack-job. My parents won't be able to come home from Malaysia for the holidays, so we figured we should take the chance to make good on our obligation to the Whack-job. It really is our turn. Well, not really. There is one other brother who should take a turn, but he's ridiculously unreliable, so what's the use. We'll take this chance to unload some of Jim's guilt. I figure I have enough friends near-by that I can bail if I need to. You know, me and my two kids. Ha!

Oh, before I forget... Kathy McC, can you e-mail me your address?

I had stuff I wanted to say. I have spent days having entry after entry pop into my head, but now that I sot down to write one, I got nothing interesting. I know, I keep saying that. I'll do better soon, I promise.

So, um, yeah, I wish I had a good joke or something I could end with. Seems like a good place for a laugh. Maybe you all could share something funny in my comments to entertain all of us? Got a good joke, or a funny story to tell? Have at it.

Talk amongst yourselves.

Thursday, May 10, 2007


Well, after a hellish week with no internet thanks to trying to switch from cable to dsl, I'm back. You try and save a buck with a "bundle" and as a bonus you lose all tough with the world at large for a week.

So, Hi! I'm still here.

Hey, I met Kathy McC at Motherhood and Angels!! She's awesome! I wish we were close enough that she could come over for coffee at our leisure! We had fun and I sincerely hope we can do it again. Big brother was in school, but let me tell you,, Kam is a doll! Barely so much as a wimper (I think she may have a totally different kid oon her hands now that his ears are fixed) while we ate a shopped and that smile! Oh, that smile will melt your heart. Fun stuff!

We're going to Atlanta Saturday for Jim's nephew's college "Gradulation", as Gracie says. She's excited about the plane ride and I am excited about the little detour.

Things with CC seem to be okay, as far as I know. Movement is still spotty and only serves to make me nuts. I have one day of feeling CC all the time and then two days of almost nothing. It's going to be the death of me.

I was thinking of all of you during my unplanned internet vacation. Especially you, Catherine. I'm not totally caught up yet, but it seems you have survived the birthdays. I'm still sending you hugs and love.

Off to go catch up!

Wednesday, May 02, 2007

Panic Attack #1

And, I only label this "#1" because it's the first to require a trip to the OB's just to hear the heartbeat. I suppose if I had ordered the doppler, I could have avoided this, but I haven't and don't know if I willl even still.

Jim's was out of town last night and we had our first major thunderstorm. Normally, I love to watch the storms pass, but last night must have gotten me; I had the most horrible nightmares. I've gotten lucky with the nightmares really, I had some right after Audrey was born and occassionally since, but last night was relentless.

So, in and out, 155 bpm. Phew. Waiting for results on the quad screen. I guess I'll get those in a few days. All is well with the kid and my belly is showing it.

Spring has finally sprung here. The birds are out, everything is blooming and I think I can finally put all of Gracie's winter stuff in the basement. Thank God, because she had grown out of nearly everything. She's so excited to be wearing her dresses and skirts regularly now.

Totally borning update. Sorry.